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Communist Jokes

Corona Virus Jokes
Why did the Chinese communist party try to cover up the outbreak of the corona virus disease?
They were afraid not everyone could get it.
Family Puns
My communist grandparents hated each other, but still stayed married for more than 60 years.
It was a so-be-it union.
Onion Puns
What do you call a communist onion? You call it a red onion.
History Puns
My history teacher is a communist, so I made lots of references to the Soviet Union in my essay.
I got full marx.
Violin Puns
What do you call a communist violin?
The second Fidel.
Bacon Puns
Why do communist hate bacon?
Because it’s from capitalist pigs.
Vegetable Puns
What do you call a communist vegetable
a soviet onion.
Monster Puns
What do you call a communist vampire?
A red blood count.
One Liners and Short Jokes
After Stalin died, he met the angel of death. The angel explained to Stalin he can only send him to hell but he lets him to choose which hell.
"Do you prefer to burn in a capitalist hell or a communist hell?" It asks him.
I choose the communist one because there will surely be a shortage of coal.