What do you call a snowman party?
A snowball.
What happened when the snowgirl had a fight with the snowboy?
She gave him the cold shoulder.
What type of room do you eat? A mush room.
Why do trees always get hired? They have the right qual-leaf-ications.
What did the flower say when her son went off to college?
I be-leaf in you.
Did you hear about the flower who gave an ultimatum to her husband?
She told him once and floral.
What did the tree say after someone hit it? We should really call the copse.
What has leaves, is green and a trunk? A houseplant heading on vacation.
What tree makes fruit that tastes a lot like chicken? Poultree.
Why did the frog lose his job on the mushroom farm? He stole the toads-tool.
What does a flower write on their valentine?
Aloe you vera much.
Why did the sapling go to the doctor’s office? He was feeling a little green.
There are lots of funny jokes about mushrooms that can give you stitches. However, you need to be patient enough because they need time to grow on you.
What kind of alcohol do flowers drink?
Rosé.
Why are plants the best chefs?
They’re succulent.
What does a triangle palm like to study in school? Trigonometree.
Why didn’t the flower get a second date?
He was garden variety.
Why did the Platanus occidentalis have to go to the doctor more than the other trees? Because it was always sycamore.
How do trees get onto the internet? They just log on.
What was the worst crime in the tree kingdom? Tree-son.
Why was the tree doctor so good at his job? He could always get to the root of the problem.
What would Jerry McGuire have said if he was a flower?
You had me at hydrangea.
If trees could kill you, they wood.
What’s a good winter tip?
Never catch snowflakes on your tongue until all the birds have flown south for the winter.
What are the best mushrooms to have with a jacket potato? Button mushrooms!
There’s two balloons in the desert. One says look out for that cactus!
The other goes What Cactussssss...
If you live in an igloo made of snow, what’s the worst thing about global warming?
No privacy!
What did the water plant worker say when their facility flooded?
Dam.
Why are Christmas trees so clean? They know how to spruce things up.
Why did the Sugar Maple have to go to the dentist? It really needed a root canal.
What did the flower do when she was challenged?
Rose to the occasion.
What sort of ball doesn’t bounce?
A snowball!
What did the flower say after he told a joke?
I was just pollen your leg!
Why was the pine tree always in trouble? It kept being knotty.
What did the flower say when he wanted a second chance?
I’ll grow on you.
Why are leaves always getting into risky business? They keep having to go out on a limb.
Why won’t the mushroom buy a couch? - He prefers toadstools.
Did you hear about the aspen who fell for the loggers’ scam? The copse wood not believe she fell for it.
How do Eskimos make their beds?
With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
I was not allowed to do my stand up act at the mushroom comedy show. I guess I am not a fungi.
What type of diet did the snowman go on?
The Meltdown Diet.
The fungi turned down seconds at dinner because he never had mushroom.
. How can you easily identify a dogwood tree? By listening to the bark.
Where do the mushroom family keep their umbrellas, coats and shoes? In their porch-ini!
What do pines eat for breakfast? Past-trees.
Why are dogwood trees amazing pets? They have a great bark and a wooden bite.
The reason why mushrooms are always welcome even in high-end parties is because everybody believes they are really fun-guys.
What did the tree do when it found that the bank had closed? It starts a new branch.
Scientists have genetically modified a Venus Fly Trap to have the skin of a cactus
They say its bark is worse than its bite.
The plant was tired of being boring.
It has decided to turn over a new leaf.