What tree is bought the most at the plant store?
The poplar tree
Why are we only concerned about snowmen not snowwomen?
Because only men are stupid enough to stand out in the snow without a coat.
What time is it when little white flakes fall past the classroom window?
Snow and Tell.
Why are bad knitters and Christmas trees alike? They both drop their needles.
What did the flower say after he told a joke?
I was just pollen your leg!
What sort of cakes do snowmen like?
The ones with thick icing!
A team of mushrooms was playing basketball against a team of cabbages. The mushrooms won. Everyone cheered for the champignons.
What does the birch like to study in school? Chemistree.
Did you hear about the loggers who stopped cutting down the forest? The trees really felt re-leafed.
Can you tell me what type of weeping tree this is? Yes, but you willow me one later.
What do you call a giant mushroom? Hu-fungus.
What does a flower do when they get caught in a lie?
Backpetal.
What do you call a gangsta snowman?
Froze-T.
What did the Christmas tree tell his crush? I pine for you.
Did you hear about the flower who never bloomed?
It was a bud omen.
What do chic evergreens wear for cruelty-free fashion? Faux fir.
When Mr. Mushroom saw Miss Mushroom, he didn’t hesitate to ask her out on a date because he had she was such a fungi-rl.
Why won’t the mushroom buy a couch? - He prefers toadstools.
Why did the lettuce and the mushroom break up? The lettuce was pretty but the mushroom did not have much room for her in his life.
What do you say to a flower after a breakup?
Get clover it.
What are the best mushrooms to have with a jacket potato? Button mushrooms!
If you live in an igloo made of snow, what’s the worst thing about global warming?
No privacy!
What type of mushrooms can you put on a jacket? Button mushrooms.
Why did the Sugar Maple have to go to the dentist? It really needed a root canal.
So I cut down a tree using my vision today
It’s true, I SAW it with my own eyes.
What do you see when an elephant hides behind a tree?
The trunks
What do you call an old snowman?
Water.
I was thinking about using a mushroom to poison someone. My morel stopped me.
How would you scare a snowman?
Get a hairdryer!
Don’t ask me for any tree puns.
Acacia haven’t noticed I’m all out.
What did the rock say after it rolled into a tree? Nothing because rocks can’t talk.
What’s an ig?
A snow house without a loo!
A chemist plants a seed.
He takes good care of it every day. He waters it and fertilizes the soil around it. As it becomes a big and healthy tree, the chemist thinks to himself: What a good chemist-tree.
Why do toadstools grow so close to each other? They do not need mushroom to grow.
What do you call a grandpa flower?
Poppy.
What is a flower’s favorite Journey song?
Don’t stop be-leafing.
Why do trees have to drink responsibly? Otherwise, they become a bunch of trunk idiots.
Why aren’t trees competitive sports fans? They like to root for everyone.
Why are trees so active in politics? They really like grass roots movements.
What do you call a slow skier?
A slopepoke!
When darkness sets in, fungi much like many other organisms go to sleep, but in mush-rooms.
What do you get from sitting on the snow too long?
Polaroids!
During the contribution’s session, the mushroom family never gave a lot. They were just two spore.
What type of room do you eat? A mush room.
What did the flower say to his wife when he brought her home a present?
I hope thistle cheer you up.
Why don’t trees travel in groups? Because two’s a company, but tree’s a crowd.
What kind of money snowmen use in the North Pole?
Cold cash!
What did the teacher say when he sent the naughty student out of the (mush)room? - You’re in big truffle young man!
What type of diet did the snowman go on?
The Meltdown Diet.
Why was the tree so embarrassed during the winter? After her leaves fell, she felt naked.