What’s a skeleton’s least favorite room in the house?
The living room.
Where do zombies go for beach holidays?
The Dead Sea.
What is a wolf’s favorite time of the year?
The howl-o-days.
What did the skeleton say when he went riding on his motorcycle?
- I’m bone to be wild!
Judging by the sounds, there’s an ogre staying in the hotel room above me.
Hopefully he shreks out tomorrow.
Witch you were here.
Why was the skeleton a success at work?
He had a head for business.
Why did the mummy get a divorce?
His wife was a ghoul-digger who was just after his mummy.
Where do zombies go sailing?
Lake Eerie.
What happens if a big ghoul steps on Batman and Robin?
They become flatman and ribbon!
A ghost's favourite pie flavour is boo-berry.
What do you call a bunch of zombie chickens?
The Bu-gawking Dead
What do you call a werewolf with no legs?
Anything you like – he can’t chase you.
What does the Ghost say when he sneezes? - Ach-ooooooooooooooooooooo!
When a Minotaur considers himself an optimist is it that he sees his glass as half-bull?
Ghosts drop off their babies at the day-scare centre when they go to work.
A wise saying among werewolves: Chasing your tail will not make ends meet.
The skeleton couldn't keep anything tidy because of his lazy bones.
How do ghouls sign off a letter?
Best witches and worm regards.
Sad to hear that Baron von Frankenstein has given up on his dream of being an actor.
He couldn’t get the parts.
What kind of horse does a ghost ride? A nightmare.
Did you hear about the witch who got plastic surgery?
She looked really good afterworts.
How does a werewolf make bechamel sauce?
They start with a rooooooooouuuuuuuux.
Did you see that movie about King Kong, the giant ape?
The plot was pretty bananas.
What do you get when you cross a strict school teacher with a vampire?
Lots of blood tests.
What is a skeleton’s favorite thing to do with their cell phone?
Take skelfies.
What did one of Frankenstein’s ears say to the other?
I didn’t know we lived on the same block.
Who will Frankenstein’s monster take to the dance?
Any old girl he can dig up.
What’s Frankenstein’s favorite food?
Frankenfurters.
What do troll mathematicians like to solve?
Parabolems?
What is Dr. Frankenstein’s favorite part of a company?
Human resources.
Why did the monster call his werewolf “Frost”?
Because frost bites!
Why is Frankenstein’s monster so popular?
He’s a real people person.
What did the giant say after he ate Fiji?
- I want Samoa!
What do you call a very active hydra?
Hydradynamic.
What do you call a werewolf that can’t decide what to wear?
A what-to-wear-wolf.
What did the zombie say after seeing his neighbor’s new car?
- I’m green with envy!
What’s a vampire’s favorite holiday?
Fangs-giving.
Why did the skeleton climb up the tree?
Because a dog was after his bones!
I feel like I have seen that ghost before...I must have deja boo.
What did the last of the zombies say to the survivers of the apocalypse?
- It’s been a living hell with you guys around.
A sphinx was guarding a road when a traveler walked by.
The sphinx said to the man, "You may pass if you can answer my riddle: What is wider than an ocean, heavier than a mountain, and unbounded by the laws of physics?"
The man thought for a moment and answered, "Imagination."
"Wrong," said the Sphinx. "The answer is your mom."
Why did the kraken eat 5 ships that were carrying potatoes?
Because nobody can eat just one potato ship.
What do you call a skeleton with no friends?
Bonely.
What cheese do vampires eat?
Munster.
Dracula is vegan, he can't take any risks. One stake could kill him.
What did one angry werewolf say to the other?
- I have a bone to pick with you!
What do Ghosts suffer from? Saturday fright fever.
What do you call a ghost of a man with a broken leg? A hobblin’ goblin.
What do ghouls eat for supper? Spooketi