Monster Puns

These hilarious monster puns are SPOOK-tacular!

Monster Puns

If I made werewolf puns, they would be howl-arious.
The vampire decided to eat a throat lozenge. It was the only thing he could think of to stop his coffin fit.
Which soccer position does a Ghost play? Ghoulkeeper, of course.
What did one angry werewolf say to the other?
- I have a bone to pick with you!
Where do ghosts go trick or treating? Dead ends.
What would you call a vampire who is into finance?
Account Dracula.
Yetis have declared their own independent state in the Himalayas.
It's an abomi-nation.
What do you call a skeleton who hangs out in coffee shops and listens to indie music?
A hip-ster.
Was there a spark between Frankenstein and his bride?
Yes, he simply couldn’t resistor.
What do ghouls eat for supper? Spooketi
Why did the zombie go to the doctor?
Because of his coffin.
When a big giant eel takes your hand for a meal...
...that’s a moray.
How do you talk to giants?
Use big words!
Dracula is vegan, he can't take any risks. One stake could kill him.
Why do vampires always dress so nice?
Because they’re so vein!
What’s a monster’s favorite play? Romeo and Ghouliet.
What did the lost witch ask the wizard?
- Witch way to the Halloween party?
I used to be a werewolf but I’m ok noooooooooooow!!
What do you call a sleeping werewolf?
An unaware-wolf.
What is the highest compliment a zombie can receive?
- Wow, you're in Grave condition!
Where is the Ghost’s bedroom located? Down the Hall-oween.
“Watch out! The road curves ahead” cried the skeleton.
“It’s spine“ replied the driver.
What a werewolf movie, talk about howling!
Where do fashionable ghosts shop for sheets? Bootiques.
What did Dracula say to the priest who visited his castle?
Don’t you ever cross me!
The zombie had had a really long day at work.
She was dead tired.
What sign was posted in the witches' parking lot?
Violators will be toad.
A giant fly has attacked the local police...
Police have called the SWAT team.
Why did the Ghost turn down the job? He could not see himself doing it.
What was the skeleton doing at the hockey game?
Driving the zam-boney.
What's the difference between an internet troll and a video game character?
Video game characters have lives.
Why are skeletons so good at chopping down trees?
They're LUMBARjacks!
What’s a vampire's favorite fruit?
A neck-tarine.
What do you call an undead bee?
A zom-bee.
What’s a vampire’s favorite Shakespeare play?
A Midsummer Bite’s Dream.
How did the skeleton bring his groceries home from the market?
He used his Cart-ilage.
Never believe minotaurs...
Half of everything they say is bull.
What does a vampire need for making breakfast in the morning?
Pancake batter.
What did the skeleton say to his girlfriend?
- Will you marrow me?
What tree monster prowls the forest?
Frankenpine.
Please wait, bewitcha in a minute.
Which monster did the three bears catch sleeping?
Ghouldilocks!
How can you tell that vampires love baseball?
They turn into bats every night.
What do you call a duck with fangs?
Quackula.
What did the Turkey wear on Halloween?
He was a goblin.
How did the monster predict his future?
With the horror-scope!
Who does a witch call for help with computer problems?
Hex Support!
Who do vampires buy their cookies from? The Ghoul Scouts
What do you call a one-inch zombie?
Tomb thumb!
Why did the game warden arrest the ghost? No haunting license.