Funny Pick Up Lines

Horrifically bad and funny pick up lines from men and from women

Funny Pick Up Lines

I heard you like math, so what’s the sum of U+Me?
I don't care *how* many items you've got, baby, I could check you out all day long!
Is it hot in here or is this relationship suffocating me?
Coffee, tea, or just more of me?
Do you want to be my doubles partner...for life?
I'm an endurance athlete. Think you can stand the HIIT?
Do you like science because I've got my ion you.
Are you a mosquito? ‘Cause I’m a sucker for you.
Forget about Spider man, Batman, or Superman. I’ll be your man.
Will you be my G-Protein? Because I want to be coupled with you!
That’s a nice Witch costume, but you won’t be needing the broom anymore, because you’ve already swept me off my feet.
You look like the morning sun after a long night of darkness.
Hey, can I get your number so I can use you as an alibi?
Me without you is like a sneaker without laces.
Hey baby, are you the Earth? Because all things are attracted to you...
Do you know how to hop? Because your body is in top form.
Want to see the real coming attraction?
I’m concerned you just might be my poison, Ivy
I send the best morning texts. But you’d know that already if I had your number.
Call me miles because I want you to complete me every round.
Did I just step into an E. M. Forster novel? Because any room with you in it is A Room with a View.
You're not just some bunny... you're my bunny.
A day with you is like an eternity of behind-the-ear scratches.
Did my Spotify playlist glitch? Because you are the only song I hear.
You’re just like the black line at the bottom of the pool– I’d be lost without you.
Are you the end of the pool? Because baby, I’d do anything to reach you.
Sorry, did you fart? You blow me away!
Let me give you another reason to feel thankful this year. 😏
Do you have a library card?
So you can check me out?
No, because my cat just died and I need to find a book about cat funerals.
According to the multiverse theory, there’s at least one universe where we end up together. Do you want this universe to be one of them?
Man: Do you think it was fate which brought us together?
Woman: Nah, it was plain bad luck!
I don't think you can diagnose me because there's no treatment for being madly in love.
Every time i see you, my cardiovascular system gets all worked up.
Are you going to a beauty contest? Because you are looking damn beautiful.
Can I have directions?
To your heart.
I bet you’re Ethan better in person
Are you my Appendix? Because I have a funny feeling in my stomach that makes me feel like I should take you out.
Are you a red blood cell? Because you never fail in delivering what my heart needs.
Are you a healing plant? Because Aloe you Vera much
Hello Boo-tiful.
Baby, I'm a dependent clause, and all I need is you.
Hey babe, can I colonize your land and exploit you for your natural resources.
Do you also feel the strong gravitational pull of my bed?
I was trying to think of a good pun for your name, but I can’t think of Jack
If I was your heart would you let me beat?
Is it hot in this Bikram studio, or is it just you?
Knock knock!

Who's there?

Tex.

Tex who?

Tex two to tango.
I'll put a tear drop in the ocean. When you find it is when I'll stop loving you.
I’d be Ryan if I said you weren’t cute
You must be marked Prestissimo… because you’re dashing.