Funny Pick Up Lines

Horrifically bad and funny pick up lines from men and from women

Funny Pick Up Lines

My feelings for you are Mont-real.
I don't have a foot fetish, but I'm pretty into mistle-toe.
You are the hottest thing since sunburn.
If I had a nickel for every time I saw someone as beautiful as you, I’d still only have five cents.
You're the macaroni to my cheese.
What took you so long? I've been Kuwait-ing for you my whole life.
I bet you sound like a Tasmanian Devil in bed.
Did the sun come out or did you just smile at me?
Hey girl, you won’t need the Rosetta Stone to translate my love for you.
Your beauty is a singularity. The force of attraction between us is so powerful.
Please don’t go now. Else, I would have to go to the police station and report you to the cops. You just stole my heart.
Has a guy ever walked up to you just to tell you how beautiful you are?
They must have been much drunker than I am.
Curling? More like curling up next to you in bed, am I right?
Excuse me, I just farted over there. Can I stand here with you?
I Wanna Be Your Man
Knock knock!

Who's there?

Juno.

Juno who?

Juno I love you, don't you?
Not even Fahrenheit, Celsius, or Kelvin can measure how hot you are!
Do you have a Band-Aid? I just scraped my knee falling for you.
You're such a TEAse.
You must be a 90º angle. ‘Cause, you’re looking right!
You are one well-defined function!
Hey girl, are you a cell phone? Because I just want to look at you all night long.
Your feet must be tired, because you’ve been running through my mind all day long.
Built up some confidence to reach out…hope you don’t igNora me
You must be Egyptian, because I'm a enslaved by your eyes.
I bet you are the earth and I am the sun because you become hotter as we get closer.
You elevate checking out to a mystical event worthy only of gods and champions.
I'm going to have to get a security guard because you're trying to steal my heart.
Where there’s a Willow there’s a way… and I hope this was a good way to break the ice
You must be the North Star because the light around you guided me here.
You must be tired, because you’ve been running through my nightmares all night!
Shouldn't you be on top of the tree, Angel?
Excuse me, is your name Grace?
Because you're amazing!
My heart rate’s always higher when I hike with you.
I wish this gym had a stationary bike built for two.
Your ass is so nice, it's a shame you have to sit on it.
I’m not a photographer, but I can definitely picture your number on my phone.
There are many fish in the sea but you're the only one that's caught my eye.
Are you the moon? Because even when it’s dark you still seem to shine.
Life is better when we stick together.
My love for you burns stronger than my urinary tract infection.
I don’t want an apple a day because I don’t want you to go away.
If I freeze, it's not a computer virus. I was just stunned by your beauty.
Hey sugar-buns, do you play Center? Wanna be the center of my attention?
You're as hot as a desert summer.
There are two types of people in this world: People who love chocolate and people who love you. And I don't love chocolate.
Your bible would look great on my nightstand.
Is there a fireman around? Because you are smoking hot.
Sorry, but you owe me a drink. Why? Because when I looked at you, I dropped mine.
Sorry, I can't play hide and seek. Someone like you is simply impossible to find.