What do we call a scientist who specializes in pineapples? He might be called a pineappleologist!
What do you get with surprise peas?
Wet legs
What's the difference between a pickle and a psychiatrist?
If you don't know, you ought to stop talking to your pickle!
Why was the burger sad after losing the race? Because the hotdog was the weiner.
If a crocodile makes shoes, what does a banana make ? Slippers
An angry fruit yells at traffic in front of them
“Mango!”
What do you get when you play Tug-of-War with a pig? Pulled-Pork
What do you call a single, solitary kernel of corn?
A unicorn!
This guy walks into the doctor's office with a cucumber up his nose, a carrot in his left ear and a banana in his right ear.
What’s the most supportive beer?
Root beer.
What kind of fruit salad is most resistant to sunburn?
The kind with extra melon in.
Did you see the award-winning movie about a hot dog? It was an Oscar wiener!
When she spotted fake ramen in her soup, she said, “ This soup has impasta in it.”
What cheese do beavers like? eDam
I can’t remember who it’s by, but you could have “It Started With A Hershey’s Kiss”.
What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?
French onion soup.
What drink do goalies hate? Penal-tea.
My doctor said I need to change my diet. He said I should eat more more caviar and drink more champagne. So, I said, "That's insane! What kind of a diet is that?" He replied, "It's called a High Fluten Diet."
How do you make an apple puff? Chase it round the garden.
What happens when you buy too much ice cream?
Breyer’s remorse.
What is ice cream’s favorite day of the week?
Sundae.
Why did the ice cream truck break down?
There was a rocky road.
What is a cow's favorite deli meat? Bull-ogna!
A cued peach visual communication system is used with people suffering from peach and hearing impairment.
What did the man say after his boss threw cheese, milk, and creamer in his face? How dairy!
What’s the National Donut Day theme song?
“Donut Stop Believing.”
Wholey-grain! You really bread my mind!
What do you call a dinosaur that drinks curry? A Mega-sore-arse.
Where was the first donut cooked?
In Greece.
A narwhal is just a tuna-corn.
What do the peanuts and walnuts have in common? They are both nuts.
How did the roommate who stole the last avocado from the fruit bowl justify her thievery?
“I know it’s wrong, but it feels so ripe!”
All potato puns are pomme de terrible.
What do you get when you dip a kitten in chocolate?
A Kitty Kat bar.
What group of cheese has been known to fly? Curds of prey!
This year I'm carving my pumpkin to look like an intricate ball of rope, so it can be a gourd-ian knot.
Did I invite you to the Barbecue?
Then why are you all up in my grill?
"You focaccia bag, crumb back and get it."
Accidentally I spilt some tomato ketchup in my eye.
In Heinze sight, it was my mistake.
I tried out a lactose free diet. I stopped because I couldn’t figure out how to milk the almonds.
What did the Mama Hot Dog say to the little frankfurter? Ketch-up!
Happy Hour is at wine o’ clock
Why did the principal bring Clam Chowder to school? For the Soup-erintendent.
What do you call a pig that can tell you about his ancestors? History in the bacon.
What do we call a chicken inside a hot tub? – It is called soup.
Challah if you see me in the streets. Will do.
My wife told my four year old daughter that she couldn’t use her plastic IKEA knife to slice mangos.
I said “Yeah kid, that’s just not going to cut it.”
What is a lion’s favorite cheese?
Roarquefort.
When you want to propose to a person who loves strawberries, just say, "I love you berry much."
Why did the parmesan swipe left on the cheddar?
His pick-up line was too cheesey.