Animal Puns

Animals and puns are two terrific things. Put them together and things get really punny!

Animal Puns

Did you hear about the guy who got killed by a bear?
It was a grizzly death.
Why are dinosaurs no longer around? Because their eggs stink.
What is a dog’s favorite coordinates?
K9.
What do you call a camel without humps?
Humphrey.
If you have a bee in your hand, what do you have in your eye? Beauty, because beauty is in the eye of the bee-holder.
What happened when the koala house party got a little too far out of hand? One of the neighbors koalaed the cops.
How do you know if there is a Brachiosaurus in bed with you? By the dinosnores.
What does a dog love to eat while watching a movie?
Pupcorn.
How do you make a glow worm happy?
Cut off his tail, he’ll be de-lighted!
There was a fight at the fish restaurant last night.
Two haddock got battered.
Each time the cow escaped, the farmer would find him hiding in Moo York City.
Why couldn’t the cat finish watching her movie? Because she had it on paws!
What's green with red spots?
A frog with the chicken pox.
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball!
Why did Jesus ask Judas to crave the turkey?
Beause he knows he likes stabbing others in the back.
What do you call an ant from overseas?
Import-ant.
What do you call an turkey with a carrot in each ear? Anything you want as he can't hear you!
What do you call an ant that moves to another country?
An emigr-ant.
What do you call a pig that drives around recklessly?
A road hog.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice burg-ers.
We did not understand what the mother turtle was saying because it was all in ridleys.
What do you call a talking kangaroo?
A quantum leap.
What has 80 teeth and 2 eyes ?
A crocodile.
Q. How do you make a sasquatch, a yeti, or a bigfoot laugh?
A. Tell it a gorilla joke!
What do you get when you combine a kangaroo with a donkey?
A Kick-Ass
What do you call a pig that gets the test answer wrong?
Mistaken bacon.
What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars? Tyrannosaurus wrecks!
Where do otters come from?
Otter Space.
Sometime flamingos get fixated on one thing, and it can be hard to get them to see things from another pers-peck-tive.
What do you get when you cross an elephant and a fish?
Swimming trunks!
What do mountain climbers share around the campfire?
Goat Stories!
What two members of the cow family go everywhere with you?
Your calves.
What’s big and grey and wears a mask?
The elephantom of the opera.
Why did the mouse stay inside? Because it was raining cats and dogs.
What kind of fish will help you hear?
A herring aid!
What did the duck say when he dropped the dishes?
“I hope I didn’t quack any.”
He has some good puns on crows, but he doesn’t have to keep crowing about it.
My fat parrot escaped from its cage... To be honest, it's a weight off my shoulders!
What was the motto of the unique deer? Deer to be different!
Where do bad beavers go?
They're dammed to hell.
What happens when an alligator drives a boat?
He becomes a navigator.
Have you seen the gators on skateboards, they are great alli-skaters.
Why was the cat kicked out of the game? They thought she was a cheetah.
What medicine do you give to sick ants?
Antibiotics.
I threw water on a flamingo the other day
Now it's just an O.
Why are tigers said to be religious? Because they frequently prey with all their family members.
Where do beavers go for a hair cut? To the bobber shop.
Hit the hammer that judges have and says “worm court is in session”. Then says
“All writhe”
What are pigs celebrating when they celebrate their birthday? The day they were boar-n.
What’s a llama’s favorite drink?
Llamanade.